DCUO Blog 3: Blastzone, Diary of a Supervillain

I’ve started actually playing the multiplayer content of DC Universe Online (that’s what the second “M” in “MMO” means! the first one is a typo). The other day I did one of the group alerts, and actually played my role pretty well. (Crackshot is a Controller. I KNOW WHAT THESE WORDS MEAN.) Yesterday I started joining in the Ring War PVP event in Metropolis, which involves gathering Green Lantern Power Batteries and trying to murder other players. It was all good fun, except for the parts where I myself was being murdered.

 Fortunately, as in real life, dying means you revive at your home base (see: Mysterion). Then, you should probably repair your equipment, which costs money. Maybe you should stock up on some more “Soder Cola” next time!

Oh by the way, all the potions are variations of “Soder Cola” which is a kind of soda that is apparently related to the DCU canon. Whatever, comics.

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Dear Diary,

Today I got a pretty awesome new shirt. I thought I’d show you, Diary.

Totally got it from doing some quest for Luthor. You would not believe how much better Lex is at mentoring than the Joker. Why, just the other day, J-date had me fly down to Amusement Mile to pick up a gas mask to protect myself from his Joker Gas (or whatever). That sounds good, right? EXCEPT

HE HID IT IN A GIANT GIFT BOX

AND HE PUT LIKE 100 OTHER GIFT BOXES AROUND IT

AND THE OTHER GIFT BOXES HAD KILLER ROBOTS IN THEM.

It’s stuff like that, Diary, that really makes me wonder about that guy. That, and his Vault.

Ambush Bug and the Joker teamed up to give us villains something cool in theory: a Vault full of “fun, mayhem, and prizes” that we can visit once daily. IN THEORY THIS IS FUN. In reality, when I visit, there’s a bunch of giant balls and some more gift boxes. This time, the boxes can have money (up to three dollars each!) or gear (lame gear!) or other stuff (I haven’t found it!). Mostly it’s $3 boxes. I know it sounds greedy, Diary, but have you ever been warped? I know you haven’t because you are a diary. Well let me tell you, warping gives you nausea. Also, in a world where a can of Soder Cola costs $30, $3 doesn’t really get you a lot. (Except nausea. I covered that.)

Lex is a pretty cool guy, though, and he owns a night club full of hot babes. Joker, though?? KILLER ROBOT BOXES

I MEAN SERIOUSLY COME ON MAN, I WORK FOR YOU

-Love, Blastzone